People say I look like Han Solo

Well, here we are. Hooked-up and online. Connected, if you will, or, as my Grandfather would have it, on "the email," not that his thoughts have any validity anymore, at least not since he started wearing rubber pants and calling me Dad. I don't care how much he complains about the nurses stealing his money and touching him improperly, it's better than having him at home.

So, why a blog, I hear you asking. Well, what am I supposed to do: bought a modem, searched some porn, wrote some emails, searched some more porn, or, mo' porn, and what else is there left for me, huh? All the great loves already loved, all the great fights already fought, there's nothing left to do. But why don't you get out there into the world, do some good, fight some injustice, you say? Well, good point, well made, but, no, I'm lazy, have a bad back, and to tell you the truth, I do use "the email" to search for mo' porn from time to time and there's only so many hours in the day.

What can you expect from this blog? Well, In what I hope will be a ongoing series of my insight, worldly wisdom and thoughts, no less important than perhaps The Diary of Anne Frank or Napoleon’s War diaries, will no doubt be reduced to blabbering gibberish about the kids today, rubber pants and, if you're lucky, the odd dick-and-fart joke in less than a week; but nevertheless, welcome. I'll do my best to keep this thing as magnificent as is humanly possible, but more than likely you’ve gone already or are looking for vegetable related porn and ended up here. Not to worry, there’s something for everybody at the Mark’s VegetableGarden .

NOTE: There may not be anything for anyone at George's Vegetable Garden; the proprietors of blogger.com are investigating whether or not to allow this fool to take up precious online journal space, or to instead, publish the work of a wild monkey hitting keys at random - which would arguably produce the same standard of work.

Anyway, important factors to note:

1. Am slowly working my through Rolling Stones’ 100 Greatest Albums of all time and will update as I get deeper into the fold. So far, nothing has touched Brian Wilson and the lads' Pet Sounds, an album every bit as good as it's made out to be.

2. Quantum Leap is by far the greatest science fiction television ever to air and I’ll fight any nerd who dares say otherwise; pending, of course, they are extremely strong female Trekkies and/or Stargate fans – those fellers fight dirty.

3. If it came down it to it, I would choose Labyrinth over The Dark Crystal everytime.

4. Certain people would have you believe that I look nothing like Han Solo, but rather, something akin to this man:

I hate you Mitchell.

but more on this comparison later...

5. Zeppelin do indeed rule.

Anyway, I'm already bored...will post righteous thoughts on the Beach Boys' Ways of Righteousness (commonly known as Pet Sounds) soon. Until then, always remember:

"Leasing may be the fast track to an appearance of affluence, but equity will keep you warm at night."

Mark.